I tell people that I am what I needed when I went through my divorce eight years ago. The saying, “You don’t know what you don’t know,” holds especially true for divorce. The process of divorce is both highly emotional and, unfortunately, a business. The decisions you make during your divorce can affect you for the rest of your life. Most people have no idea what their options and rights are or even what resources are available to help them.
I work with clients to help them navigate the process of divorce, wherever they are in the process. I have some clients who haven’t even decided if they want to get divorced yet, are looking to understand what the process would involve, and how things may look after.
For other clients, I can explain the different ways to get divorced, offer referrals to divorce professionals, help them with tasks necessary for their divorce, like gathering their financial information or creating a possible co-parenting plan, and offer support through challenges like coparenting with an ex, and telling friends and family about the divorce.
Often I work as part of a client’s “divorce team,” not replacing anyone in the process, but helping and supporting my client through the process. Most people getting divorced need more support than the professional leading the legal process can provide.
I began this career to make sure that no one ever has to go through what I went through in my own divorce. I had no one to guide me or to help make sure that the decisions I was making were what was best for me and my family. I made a lot of mistakes and was given a lot of bad “advice” because I just didn’t know any better.
Whether it’s helping clients buy or sell a home, making their way through the process of divorce, or sometimes both, I use my own experiences to give my clients the same level of support and guidance that I needed in those situations.
What I love most about both of my careers is being the one to guide people through some of the most pivotal and emotional life experiences someone can go through — a divorce, or a purchase or sale of their family home. Everyone enters these experiences with different emotions and levels of trepidation, but regardless of their emotional state when they start, I always see a transformation once they come through the process.
For clients facing a divorce, whether or not they initiated it, what their future looks like is unknown. The person they become after enduring the process always fills me with awe and admiration. Despite whatever their current life has handed them, they persevere and find their way through to new beginnings.
I would love to help make the profession of “divorce coaching” well known to people in our Rochester community, so that if they or a loved one finds themselves facing a divorce, they know there is a resource to help them navigate the process.
I would also like to educate the public that when choosing someone to help them buy or sell a home due to divorce, they should choose a real estate agent who has the unique knowledge and experience to guide them through the process. While I work with people buying and selling homes for a multitude of reasons, selling or buying during a divorce presents its own unique challenges. Make sure your agent knows and understands what those are.
Rachel Wexler, CDC® Certified Divorce Coach, Licensed Real Estate Salesperson
In addition to being a Certified Divorce Coach, I am also a Licensed Real Estate Salesperson in New York State. This allows me to not only help you navigate the emotional and confusing process of divorce, but to help guide you through one of the biggest complications of divorce…what to do about the family home. My experience is personal as well as professional. I went through my own, High Conflict, divorce as a stay at home mom of three kids. You don’t know, what you don’t know…and I don’t want other women to have to walk that path alone. Let me be your thinking partner and help you find your own light at the end of the tunnel.
I have two websites: CompassionateDivorceCoaching.com and HomesByRachelWexler.com. Both sites help you navigate prepare for and navigate life transitions, including divorce. Let’s talk and see if I can support your goals. You can reach me at rachel@compassionatedivorcecoaching.com.
* Previously published at: Brighton Connections, August, 2022
